Have you ever had that moment when God completely breaks your heart for the lost? I was just listening to some worship music on youtube (some Selah and "Be Born In Me" - Francesca Battistelli) when all of the sudden I just start weeping out of nowhere for the souls of the ladies who escort women into the abortion mill. And by weeping, I mean uncontrollable (almost making me physically sick) groaning/weeping. These women are very calloused toward God and it makes me so sad to know they do not experience the peace, love, comfort, and presence of the Holy Spirit like I do. My heart is crying out to God to save these women, to show them that He is REAL, and that their hearts will no longer be hardened.
I love the sweet presence of God. I always want to stay in this moment forever. It's all that I long for and ever desire in this world. He always seems so real and present when He grips my heart for those dying and going to hell. It's like I get to see Him in a new way and experience His heart.
And then I cry out to Him asking Him never to leave- wanting to feel this way for the rest of my time on earth- knowing that He is not the one who leaves, but I am. I fill my life with so much junk and worries of the world that there is no room for His presence to be felt and known.
Oh, forgive me Lord. Use me. Change me. Mold me.
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